Great Gift Ideas for the Mother-in-law on Mother’s Day


Peter Petrie Egg Separator

It’s an egg separator, and yes the egg whites do drip out of this little man’s nose, and yes this is REAL, not a joke.

I’m completely serious, you can actually buy this egg separator at a REAL online store by clicking on this link http://www.stupid.com/fun/EGSP.html.

I’m not really sure what they were thinking when they designed this thing, but I can say that this is definitely going on my list of must have presents that I send out to my relatives before my birthday. I’m sure your mother-in-law is dying to have one as well.

A Bottle of Charles Shaw

There’s no one in the world who doesn’t love a little two buck chuck. This is practically axiomatic. This mother’s day, your mother-in-law will fall in love once again with the great wine country of Napa Valley California (or she’ll just look at you awkwardly and you’ll start overhearing her making compliments about what a nice boy your wife’s old boyfriend was).

A Cactus

I know that cacti have become intensely fashionable as gifts in the last couple of years. I know that people DO give cacti as gifts to people that they care about. I understand, and you don’t need to explain this to me. So don’t leave comments calling me an intolerant beast because I rip on cacti.

But having said this, I must also say that cacti are FAR FAR too semiologically loaded to serve as mother’s day gifts for your dear old mother. Really. Don’t play around with this one. Your poor old mother deserves better.

On the other hand, a cactus might just be the best way to show your mother-IN-LAW that you care. Why not?

The Blue Pill Wonder

Viagra. Yes I know, what is she supposed to do with this is what you’re thinking. Well slipping it in her hubby’s drink would work. The umm…benefits, would certainly get her off your back if it was lack of lovin’ that was causing her crabbiness. If not, she could always conduct her own Erectile DysFlower Experiment.

Butt/Face Soap

Let’s go into the pros and cons of giving your mother-in-law butt/face soap for mother’s day. (In case it’s not self-explanatory, one side of the soap is for your face and the other is for your rear end. This way you don’t have to touch both… …you get the idea.)

Pros:

Your mother-in-law will never wash her face and her rear end with the same side of the soap, EVER AGAIN. I’m counting on this being enough to convince you that this gift brings a whole heaping spoon full of genuine use-value for which your mother-in-law will be forever grateful.

Cons:

Your mother-in-law may never speak to you again. (If appropriate, you may move this one over to the “pros” list.)

Your mother-in-law may be offended by the word “butt” itself.

Your mother-in-law may not get the joke. (Please don’t explain it to her. This will only make things worse.)

Your mother-in-law may not appreciate this subtle intimation that there is a major difference in cleanliness between one side of her and the other. Proceed with caution. http://www.stupid.com/fun/BFSP.html

The eDrugstore writing team has hundreds of articles published online and in print, covering everything from sexual health, to dating advice, entertainment and more. eDrugstore.MD, a safe online pharmacy offers a wealth of health knowledge as well as great Entertainment.

Short URL: http://man-over-board.com/?p=7218

Posted by Eric on Apr 22 2010 Filed under FEATURES, MONEY, NEWS, PICTURES, SELF HELP. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this entry