The Nets Absolute Best Compilation for “Yo Mama”

Seeing how we just celebrated Mothers Day, we felt this Sunday we should celebrate Yo Mama Day. It’s all in good fun and if by any chance you have one that is funnier, please let us know. We pride ourselves on having the ultimate Yo Mama list on the net today.

Leave it to MOB to find and share with you our favorite  ”Yo Mama”

Why you might ask, did we compile this? Cuz Yo Mama asked us, that’s why!!!

The Definitive “Yo Mama”  List

YO MAMMA so fat, she has smaller fat women orbiting around her!
YO MAMMA so ugly her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her.
YO MAMMA so ugly, American express left home without her.
YO MAMMA is so fat, she took up pages 41, 42 and 43 in her school yearbook
YO MAMMA so ugly, she could scare the chrome off a bumper!
YO MAMMA so ugly, she has to get her vibrator drunk first.
YO MAMMA so fat, she’s got more Chins than a Chinese phone book
YO MAMMA so ugly, it looks like her neck threw up
YO MAMMA so ugly she made an onion cry.
YO MAMMA so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn’t have to kiss her goodbye.
YO MAMMA so stupid she took a spoon to the super bowl
YO MAMMA is so fat that when god said,” Let there be light,” he told her to move her fat ass out the way first!
YO MAMMA so stupid, she put a ruler next to her bed to see how long she sleeps!
YO MAMMA so old when I told her to act her age, she died
YO MAMMA so stupid, she tried to steal a free sample!
YO MAMMA so fat she sweats mayonnaise!
YO MAMMA so big, her belly button has an echo.
YO MAMMA so poor, she stands outside Kentucky fried chicken and licks other peoples fingers!!!!
YO MAMMA so fat, her blood type is Ragu
YO MAMMA so fat, her baby pictures were taken by satellite
YO MAMMA so ugly, she’s like Taco Bell. When people see her, they run for the border
YO MAMMA so old, she owes Jesus 3 bucks
YO MAMMA so stupid she tripped over a cordless phone.
YO MAMMA so fat, she sat on a dollar and made it four quarters.
YO MAMMA so ugly, when she went to the beautician it took 12 hours. . .for a quote!
YO MAMMA so ugly, she practices birth control by leaving the lights on!
YO MAMMA so ugly, she puts on her makeup in the dark!
YO MAMMA so ugly, she won’t even play with herself!
YO MAMMA so ugly, the psychiatrist makes her lie face down.
YO MAMMA so ugly, the tide won’t even take her out.
YO MAMMA so ugly, they used her in prisons to cure sex offenders!!
YO MAMMA so ugly, when she walk by the bathroom the toilet flushes.
YO MAMMA so ugly, when she was born the doctor slapped her momma!
YO MAMMA so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillance cameras

YO MAMMA so ugly her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her
YO MAMMA so old, she got her drivers license on a dinosaur
YO MAMMA so fat, she’s got more nooks and crannies than an English Muffin
YO MAMMA so fat, that she has to put her belt on with a boomerang.
YO MAMMA so fat that this town really ISN’T big enough for the both of us
YO MAMMA so fat, that she has to put her belt on with a boomerang.
YO MAMMA so ugly when she walks down the street in September, people say “Wow, is it Halloween already?”
YO MAMMA so ugly when I took her to the zoo they said, “Thanks for bringing’ her back!”
YO MAMMA so fat, she got Baptized at sea world.
YO MAMMA is so stupid when she went to Walgreen’s she said “hey, these walls isn’t green.
YO MAMMA so ugly that she entered in the ugly contest they said, “no professionals”
YO MAMMA is so old, when god said let there be light she tripped the switch
YO MAMMA is so stupid she thought Fruit Punch was a Gay Boxer.
YO MAMMA so stupid she sat on the TV and watched the couch.
YO MAMMA so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday.
YO MAMMA so ugly that if ugly were bricks she’d have her own projects.
YO MAMMA so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.
YO MAMMA so ugly they filmed “Gorillas in the Mist” in her shower!
YO MAMMA so ugly when they took her to the beautician it took 12 hours. . .for a quote!
YO MAMMA so ugly she tried to take a bath the water jumped out!
YO MAMMA so ugly she looks out the window and gets arrested!
YO MAMMA so ugly even Rice Krispies won’t talk to her!
YO MAMMA so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.
YO MAMMA so ugly just after she was born, her mother said “What a treasure!” and her father said “Yes, let’s go bury it.”
YO MAMMA so ugly she turned Medusa to stone!
YO MAMMA so ugly The NHL banned her for life
YO MAMMA so ugly that when she sits in the sand on the beach, cats try to bury her.
YO MAMMA so ugly she scares the roaches away.
YO MAMMA so ugly I heard that your dad first met her at the pound.
YO MAMMA so old her birthday expired
YO MAMMA so fat she puts on a black and white bathing suit jumps in the pool and everyone yells free willy
YO MAMMA so fat that when she fell in love she broke it
YO MAMMA so fat she has more rolls then Walmarts bakery
YO MAMMA so fat, the only way to get her out of a telephone booth is to grease her thighs and throw a Twinkie in the street.
YO MAMMA is so fat she drives a spandex car
YO MAMMA so fat she tripped over walmart, stumbled over k-mart, and landed on target.
YO MAMMA so dumb she brought lipstick to a make-up test
YO MAMMA so fat that when we went out to the restaurant she looked at the menu and said sounds good
YO MAMMA so fat, she put on a X Files T-shirt and a helicopter tried to land on her
YO MAMMA so fat, she sat on a rainbow and skittles came out.
YO MAMMA so fat that the last time she saw 90210 was on the scales
YO MAMMA so dumb, that the Psychic Friends only charge her half price to read her mind!
YO MAMMA so fat, even God couldn’t lift her spirits!
YO MAMMA so fat when she walked into the all-you-can-eat buffet they had to install speed bumps.
YO MAMMA so fat when she steps on a scale it says, “To Be Continued…”
YO MAMMA so fat when she steps on a scale it says, “One at a time please”
YO MAMMA so stupid that she thought that babies came from the infantry
YO MAMMA so fat, when I swerved to avoid her in the street I ran outta gas.
YO MAMMA so fat, she held up her stockings with hula-hoops.
YO MAMMA so stupid, I told her it was chilli outside so she went outside with a spoon.
YO MAMMA so stupid, she climbed up a tree talking about branch management.
YO MAMMA so fat, Christopher Columbus claimed her as the new world.
YO MAMMA so stupid, she had your brother thrown in rehab, cause he was Hooked on Phonics
YO MAMMA so fat, they had to let out the shower curtain
YO MAMMA so fat, after she gets through turning around, they throw her a welcome back party
YO MAMMA so fat, she don’t take pictures, she takes posters
YO MAMMA belt size is the titled the “Equator”
YO MAMMA so stupid she bought a used ring that has never been worn.
YO MAMMA so fat, she has to get out of the car to change radio stations.
YO MAMMA so ugly, when she tried to take a bath, the water jumped out!
YO MAMMA is so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a species will be extinct.
YO MAMMA is so fat, the highway patrol made her wear ”Caution! Wide Turns!”
YO MAMMA is so fat, that she uses the refrigerator for her lunch box.
YO MAMMA so ugly, she looks like she’s been bobbing for French fries!
YO MAMMA so ugly, yo daddy rather kiss her ass than look in her face.

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Posted by Eric on May 23 2010 Filed under FEATURES, FUNNY, MEDIA, NEWS, PICTURES. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this entry